Sometimes don’t you wonder who made up the rules? There is a sense of right and wrong way of doing things. But what is right and what is wrong? What are your personal standards? If personal standards, according to themindpedia.com means, “are a set of beliefs or ideas that an individual holds dear. They can be religious, moral or ethical in nature and guide the way we behave and interact with others.” And then the question remains who are you? And, what do you believe?
The majority of us come into this world alone. We follow our parent’s rules, and we follow the law. We follow institutional rules with others because they are consequences of our decisions and actions. We have personal standards we expect from ourselves and others, fueled by our upbringing, experiences, and associations in this world. We see with our eyes and growing up, we see and feel what your parents go through most of the time. You want to emulate if you come from a loving family, and if you don’t, you want something different. As the bible states in 1 Corinthians 13:11:
“When I was a child, I spoke as a child, I understood as a child, I thought like a child, but when I became man, I put away childish things.”
Our standards derive from other areas of our lives, such as affluence, well-being, relationships, education/development, social, and entertainment. We don’t realize how vital our personal standards are to our mental state and livelihood. It is correlated with how we view ourselves, what we cherish, and what we find value in.
The things we learn over the years are only guidelines until you figure out what is best for you. Until you discover who you are, we decide what our personal standards are. It increases our self-worth and esteem for others. It provides a transparent conclusion to keep our mental, emotional, social, and physical well-being in check. We gain the ability to conquer complex tasks and accomplish any goals we set for ourselves. It allows us to streamline how we come to a conclusion on our decisions. Our personal standards help us to know and comprehend when we are beneficial to ourselves and others and when we are not. It sets a path for our distinct character and others. It also allows us to be in control, accountable, and transparent toward our goals and aspirations, whether long-term or short-term.
Our personal stands also bring our career or entrepreneurial goals. But we must remember that we are as good as anybody else. Have you ever noticed that we value European/Caucasian brands more than any own black brand? Why? Because the standards of anything black own is viewed as low quality, although it is not! Two people can purchase the same material at a store and make the same dress. One price tag is affordable, and the other is very expensive. But because the person with a well-known brand is more luxurious, they will get more sales than the other person. People will spend their money to say they have a so and so dress. We tend to lower our prices because we tend to think people will not buy from us but is that saying we don’t value ourselves?
But there are times when things can go array. When we want to be seen a certain way and someone’s standards become our own ─ we lose our identity. Why do we value what other people think of us so much? We want to be accepted, and we want to be cool, and we want to be seen as smart but sexy. Diana Ross stated, “Just because I have my standards, they think I am a bitch,” You can’t please everyone. Therefore, who cares what other people think? Be you! Be happy.
Life is a playing field. We go through it by making mistakes, falling in love, getting our hearts broken, meeting new people, and seeing new things and places. There will be things about ourselves that will change, and there will be things about ourselves that we will love. Our personal standards are not set in stone. We, as human beings, evolve. If there is something that needs to change, change it.
Find out your beliefs, why, strengths, and weaknesses. If you are anything like me, I went to church as a child, but there came a time when my mother stopped making us go. We needed to decide for ourselves if we wanted to continue on that path or not. Yes, things would have been different if we had been told to go. Other problems are derived from that as well because there is a set of rules you are encouraged to follow, which is sometimes restricting. You should not be restricted. Life is about lessons; sometimes, those lessons come from the struggles and the trouble you endure. Those struggles and troubles sometimes birth what your personal standards should be.
We lose friends, gain friends, and go to school to learn a new trade. You have to have standards for yourself, but don’t get lost in the expectation that you lose yourself and become stagnant. Always ask yourself, “What kind of life experience do you want to have?” Or, “Is this who you are?” Or, “Is this all you are?” You might have more personal standards to set for yourself.
Free your mind, so you can evolve. If you don’t change the teachings or the negative aspects of certain things and situations, physical change won’t occur.