We all know that what makes you happy might not make me happy. For whatever reason, having a smile on your face allows you to think pleasant thoughts. You have a glow that radiates off you, and your energy is inviting. Sometimes all it takes to be happy is knowing you have a second chance to get it right. Other times it’s because you feel that you have the right love in your life, you conquered your goals, or it’s a combination of it all with a few other things. However, being happy takes work, and it’s a choice! You have to choose happiness over everything else. Remember in the 1989 movie Polly, with Keisha Knight Pulliam and Phylicia Phylicia Rashad, when Polly talks about gladness? She states, “here’s one thing to be glad about. You’ll never be farther away from next week’s sermon than you are right now.” You can choose to stay miserable or find something to be happy about. Why focus on the negative? Find the positive and find your happiness!
Why sit around and focus on the negative stuff over and over again? You must accept whatever happened, learn from your mistakes, and move on with your life. Therefore, what is happiness? According to verywellmind.com, “happiness is an emotional state characterized by joy, satisfaction, contentment, and fulfillment. Happiness is generally linked to experiencing more positive feelings than negative ones.”
Have you ever woken up with a smile because, for some reason or another, you know everything will be OK with you? You see that everything is OK! Nothing doesn’t even have to be happening with you at the moment, and you know. Happiness is living in a state of positivity.
Yes! There will be difficult times, but you must practice changing your thinking. You have two choices when you are unhappy: Stay unhappy, which will make you complacent and stagnant, and Take action and find your happiness. Do not continue to put off your happiness.
- 1. Delaying your happiness. The first mistake I see people make is delaying their happiness for an unclosed future date like they are undeserving of it in the present moment.
- 2. Your happiness should not be a façade. Faking it until you make it is not an ideal way to live. You have to take accountability and control of your life.
- 3. Materialism is not happiness. Don’t convince yourself to think or believe the things you purchase will make you happy, and it’s a distraction from the problems that you are having.
- 4. Perfection is not a pathway to happiness. Acknowledge that perfection takes time and energy, which is not required for happiness. Your mistakes are lessons you need to learn to figure out what can and will make you happy. Perfection is a dystopian mindset, not governed by you but by someone else. Be genuinely happy for the real you.
- 5. Security and happiness are not synonyms of each other. So, please don’t act like it, and don’t make decisions with that conception. People tend to make decisions taking the safe route, thinking that will make their happiness when it’s just part of the ingredients. Other spices are needed to make things taste good.
- 6. Do not live by other people’s definition of happiness. You have to define happiness for yourself. Living by other people’s definition of happiness can send you toward a depressing state of mind and path. Everyone is different, and you must figure out who you are to find out what will make you happy.
- 7. Being happy doesn’t require you to hold on to anger. Let it out! People tend to hold on to their anger like it won’t fester into something else. Communication is the key! You have to find multiple ways to talk about your emotions. Yes, it feels good, but sometimes our issues and feelings are heavy, and our family and friends cannot absorb all that all the time. Therefore, go to confession, counseling, therapy, talk to god, write a letter, and even talk to your met. Know which method is appropriate.
We tend to think that there is nothing better out there for us! So we stay in misery like it’s the only option. Well, Open up the door, brothers and sisters! There is a big world with many people taking risks and living their best lives.
Philosopher Lao Tzu stated,
“If you look to others for fulfillment, you will never be fulfilled. If your happiness depends on money, you will never be happy with yourself. Be content with what you have; rejoice in the way things are. When you realize there is nothing lacking, the world belongs to you.”
Nothing is lacking because you already have everything you desire and need, so be happy. When you wake up in the morning to say your affirmations speak as if you already have what you need or desire because you will attract it to you.
Know that for you to find your happiness, you have to know who you are, and you have to be accountable for yourself. If you are happy means staying away from certain people because they bring out the worse in you, and that is what you do. Stay away, leave a job, find a new job, divorce your husband or wife, or work it out! Do what is best for you! But you have to know who you are!
Finding happiness means figuring out what happiness is to you, not anybody else. You have to put yourself first! It may seem selfish, but you must ensure you are mentally, emotionally, physically, and spiritually OK before caring for or loving anybody else. Let’s not forget about being financially OK as well. Remember, your happiness is not dependent on the amount of money you make. Being financially OK means systems and savings are in place just in case anything happens. You are covered! There is no need for you to worry or stress, and nothing to be depressed about! You are happy!