Have You Ever Realized How Profound Your Love Is for Someone After Missing the Chance to Be with Them When They Were Gone?

It’s funny how life can intimate Art! Especially when you are writing about Love and relationships.  The Theme of my book is Love, but sometimes, with Love, you are “fooled by your feelings and left feeling like a fool.” We sometimes can’t help it because a lot of people don’t even know what Love is. We want it! We want that fairytale Love that we see on TV, but that shit is fake, like the silicone breast some women love to showcase. What is Love?

The best answer I can come up with comes from the book, “The Inner Work of Relationships: An Invitation to Heal Your Inner Child and Create a Conscious Relationship Together,” Which states as quote by Jiddu Krishnamurti that reads, “Love is not a feeling; it is an action, an activity.” A lot of us tend to believe that Love is a feeling, but it’s not. People show you that they love you by the way they treat you. I had a friend tell me that about a particular guy I was seeing, how he loves you when the only time he wants to see you is when he wants sex. Using you for sex isn’t Love. He can tell you he loves you all he wants, but his action is saying something else.

I have another friend who feels like she took the person she was seeing for granted and lost him because she wasn’t attracted to him but was going to like him because he made her feel safe. She felt secure with him because he showed her that he got her; whatever she wanted, she could have if it was within his means. He should her; he cared for her by spending quality time with her, welcoming her into his life, etc. But she was also interested in another man, and she was just very attracted to him but wasn’t attentive because of his demanding job. But people make time for what they want to make time for—overwhelmed because she lost her job and is having a difficult time finding another one. She asked the first guy she was seeing for some space, and he gave her space. After giving her the space she wanted she realize she cared about him more than she comprehended. So, she asks me, “Have you ever realized how Profound Your Love Is for Someone After Missing the Chance to Be with Them When They Were Gone!” Because sometimes After you are given the space you wanted, there is no guarantee he or she will still be around. I say, then it’s not meant to be. Sometimes they are just your lesson, not your forever.

Just like one of my characters in the book Jazz. After doing what was best for her in the book. She got some news that made her think about her actions. However, she didn’t regret her actions because before she could love someone else, Jazz had to prove to herself that she loved herself more to do the right thing for herself.  Yes, it hurt the other person, but it was just a lesson, and she had to believe it was a lesson that God intended for him and her to learn.

Here is a short excerpt:

“Jazz will never really know, just like we don’t know if our “I don’t” will send a person down a rocky road toward a cliff to their end. The “I don’t” is supposed to be she is not ready. It’s supposed to make you evaluate your life and relationships, not end it. She knew he wasn’t in a good place because he was making crazy decisions that were not beneficial for him, even with him being behind bars, at least not to her. Jazz must admit she wasn’t ready to jump that broom again. She doesn’t know when she will be ready. But she feels sorry for TJ.”
~ Loves Fool by Laquann Jenkins

Many of us are experiencing issues with the relationships we choose to enter so we can learn what love is and put into practice our values and principles, thus gaining a sense of self-worth. We don’t believe we are worthy of love, and we don’t even know what love looks like. It could be staring at us right in the face, but because we don’t love ourselves, we don’t grab hold of the genuine love that enters our lives.