TO SUCCEED IS TO FOCUS AND DISCOVER YOUR NEEDS FROM YOUR WANTS

I’m over forty and supposed to have my life together, so they say. But as we all know, life throws us a curve and we lose focus. We must deal with it or slip into a slump that is difficult to get out of without the proper help. Society says that we are supposed to be married, have kids, and have promising careers by a certain age.  Truthfully, it would help if you lived for yourself, not society.  You cannot let society, your family, friends dictate what you should have. Take things one day at a time, focus, and figure out your needs and wants.

You might want a house, car, good job, but are you ready for the responsibility? Can you handle the workload, the stress that comes along with it? Do you have enough financial security that comes with owning a house? Or are you the type that wants that flashy car because Jones crossed the street from you just brought his new luxury car?

Being a successful person with your definition of success depends on your assessment of yourself, and nobody can do this work for you because you will not be your true self.  What is success? According to dictinionary.com, success is “the favorable or prosperous termination of attempts or endeavors; the accomplishment of one’s goals. The attainment of wealth, position, honors, or the like. “

Booker T. Washington states:

“Success is to be measured not so much by the position that one has reached in life as by the obstacles which he has overcome while trying to succeed.”

You must ask yourself, do you need wealth, position, honors, liking of others, or do you want it?  What is wealth to you? We all get amazed with the flashy things that we see many celebrities have, but we don’t bear witness to all the rejection they received before they received their yes!

I realized that and didn’t know why I never tried to go the traditional route of getting published. Wait, I am lying.  I understand why I went the self-publishing route, which is fear of rejection. I realized that I never submitted one submission to a publishing company, but I was saying that I failed as a writer. I also decided to self-publish without even having the money or knowledge to market my book. I was saying success failed me! But I haven’t even opened all the boxes on the table or walked through all the doors. I kept saying I wanted to write but never applied to freelance writing jobs but never did, and I opted to start my own business!

Just like, there is a difference between need and want, and there is a difference between being busy and productive. You can be busy but haven’t done anything productive in your day that acquired you to accomplish your goals. Yes, you can want many things, but how productive are you in achieving what you need to do to get it?

Time management and focus are needed when accomplishing goals. So, you can be busy and productive simultaneously.

• Stop thinking about what you can or cannot afford.
• Create a list of all your wants and needs.
• Separate them between personal and professional
• Figure out what is achievable now and what will take time to achieve. Add this to your long-term and short-term goals

By figuring out what you can do now and what you can do later, you can effectively manage your time and focus on what you need to do to accomplish your goals. Building your skills, you need to qualify for a job you can do now.

Overwhelmed; simplify your task and reduce stress. Figuring out your why by adding principles to your decision will motivate you to achieve your goals.

Utilize structure to minimize the distraction that will delay you from achieving your goals—schedule breaks. Taking breaks allows your creativity to flow and enables your mind to crawl into the tiny spaces to see what is missing—taking a step back to take a step forward.

We get so caught up in day-to-day productivity; we don’t take the time to breathe. We need to breathe ─We don’t take time to love. We need to love. Many of us don’t know how to love and receive love or be consistent in our lives. We need to show up, even if you must pretend that you’re the child in the classroom with your favorite teacher taking attendance; say, “here!”

You need and should want to be present in your life, so act like it! Think for yourself. Get to know yourself. Love yourself! The first step to expanding your life is accepting who you are—accepting all your flaws. Acceptance is the light that opens doors to the truth. Expand your mindset. Figure out your needs and wants.

Don’t worry about the tragedies of life that can happen.  Focus on the positive things that happened. Live to experience and be who you are.